When you find out your ex has a baby (for the third time)

It wasn't the first time I had spoken to this ex in 13 months but it was the first time they mentioned having a 6 month old baby.

Of course I did the math right away. How long after we broke up did "it" happen?? Leave some leeway for not knowing right away but seriously, how could he have JUST mentioned it? I guess it's weird to email an ex and say, "hey, I'm a dad now, hope you're good!" but it just took me off guard.

Three exes have now had babies with the person immediately after me.

Breakups must exude fertility vibes. I dunno.

The baby is super cute though and the awkward moment has mostly passed. I came home to my sweet love who hugged me tight and everything else melted away.

I got engaged, and then disappeared for a month!

Where did the month go? It was like 19 degrees out and I was in baggy sweater heaven (nothing is more comfortable) and now all of a sudden it's 80 degrees out. I want some winter back! Or at least a little spring.

I'm having a bit of an identity crisis. I'm not completely sure what to write about. Do I even bother writing? Or should I (continue) to pour my energy into the zillion other outlets? I started this new blog so I could leave behind a part of me I didn't really like, the transitory part that floundered after divorce. I'm not floundering anymore (at least not now) but I'm not unmarred enough to think this will always be the case. I think that's why old people are crotchety: the older you get, the more losses accumulate and maybe they make you weird and angry. I'm not weird or angry. At least not yet. But if I'm lucky enough to live another 50 years, I may have to move someplace that has a lawn so I can scream at people to get off it.

So, something exciting: I got engaged!!! I'm so crazy about this guy. That will have to be a whole other post.

Okay, that's enough for tonight.